Home
  Journal   Friends   Calendar   User Info   Memories
 

random ramblings

31st July, 2001. 2:00 am.

Last night was pretty interesting. I met up with an old "friend", let's just call him "Chud", since Jonathan called his friend when he was in similar exprience Chud. It was different senarios, but somewhat related. Basically, there is a group that I use I hang out with but haven't kept in touch with for over 7 months now because of issues. "Chud", a member of the group, and I chatted on AIM the night before, and there was so much catching up to do, so he asked if I wanted to go out to dinner, but keep it on the down low since I'm still a touchy subject in the group. We went to CPK. "Chud" and I pretty much just talked about how that group needs to grow up! They need to move on (and get over something that happened over half a year ago, but I guess nothing new can happen when you're keeping yourself in the same old lifestyle). There's more important things in life than clubbing, car shows, getting laid... whatever, they just need to face that they are not in high school any more. Although I understand where Chud's coming from, it's hard to feel like he's my friend when when he keeps saying "keep this on the down low". I understand why he wants it on the down low, and I don't want to feel bleh about it, but I just feel like I'm just an inconvience by being his friend because he's constantly telling me to keep quiet. I feel like I'm back in elementary school... remember "I'm your really your friend, but don't tell so-and-so that I talk to you"? All those childish "I'm not your friend anymore" or "If you're friends with so-and-so, then I'm not your friend too!" It's just not a nice feeling. I understand where he's coming from, but that constant nagging of keeping it on the down low makes me feel like he's not really my friend because if he really was, that part wouldn't be so important. And the constant reminder to change this entry (this has been edited, today is actually 8/1) reminds me of my mom, which is not a good thing since I'm currently having these issues with living with my mom's nagging. Now is not the time to be telling me what to do. Note: I want to make it clear that this is not an attack on Chud because I do know completely the position he's in, but I'm just venting on the yucky feeling it leaves me.

Current mood: blah.

Make Notes

Back A Day - Forward A Day